Synclude

Legal statements

Our lawyers ask us to inform you of the following:

Prices

All prices displayed on this Web site are indicative only. This Web site does not constitute a formal, written offer from Synclude. They do not include any applicable tax. Prices subject to change without notice.

Copyright

Citation is permitted provided source is mentioned. It seems obvious, but links to this Web site, including "deep links" are welcome. We would appreciate a notice of the links, though, if at all possible.

Trade Marks

Synclude is a registered trade mark of Synclude Limited.

All other company and product names mentioned herein are trademarks of their respective holders.

But we wanted to add some fun to this legal page, so we hope you will like to read the following:

Terms and Conditions

This product is meant for educational purposes only. Any resemblance to real persons living or dead is purely coincidental. Void where prohibited. Some assembly required. List each check separately by bank number. Batteries not included. Contents may settle during shipment. Use only as directed. No other warranty expressed or implied. Do not use while operating a motor vehicle or heavy equipment. Postage will be paid by addressee. Subject to CAB approval. This is not an offer to sell securities. Apply only to affected area. May be too intense for some viewers. Do not stamp. Use other side for additional listings. For recreational use only. Do not disturb. All models over 18 years of age. If condition persists, consult your physician. No user-serviceable parts inside. Freshest if eaten before date on carton. Subject to change without notice. Times approximate. Simulated picture. No postage necessary if mailed in the United States. Please remain seated until the ride has come to a complete stop. Breaking seal constitutes acceptance of agreement. For off-road use only. As seen on TV. One size fits all. Many suitcases look alike. Contains a substantial amount of non-tobacco ingredients. Colors may fade. We have sent the forms which seem right for you. Slippery when wet. For office use only. Not affiliated with the American Red Cross. Drop in any mailbox. Edited for television. Keep cool; process promptly. Post office will not deliver without postage. List was current at time of printing. Return to sender, no forwarding order on file, unable to forward. Not responsible for direct, indirect, incidental or consequential damages resulting from any defect, error or failure to perform. At participating locations only. Not the Beatles. Penalty for private use. See label for sequence. Substantial penalty for early withdrawal. Do not write below this line. Falling rock. Lost ticket pays maximum rate. Your canceled check is your receipt. Add toner. Place stamp here. Avoid contact with skin. Sanitized for your protection. Be sure each item is properly endorsed. Sign here without admitting guilt. Slightly higher west of the Mississippi. Employees and their families are not eligible. Beware of dog. Contestants have been briefed on some questions before the show. Limited time offer, call now to ensure prompt delivery. You must be present to win. No passes accepted for this engagement. No purchase necessary. Processed at location stamped in code at top of carton. Shading within a garment may occur. Use only in a well-ventilated area. Keep away from fire or flames. Replace with same type. Approved for veterans. Booths for two or more. Check here if tax deductible. Some equipment shown is optional. Price does not include taxes. No Canadian coins. Not recommended for children. Prerecorded for this time zone. Reproduction strictly prohibited. No solicitors. No alcohol, dogs or horses. No anchovies unless otherwise specified. Restaurant package, not for resale. List at least two alternate dates. First pull up, then pull down. Call toll free number before digging. Driver does not carry cash. Some of the trademarks mentioned in this product appear for identification purposes only. Objects in mirror may be closer than they appear. Record additional transactions on back of previous stub. Unix is a registered trademark of AT&T. Do not fold, spindle or mutilate. No transfers issued until the bus comes to a complete stop. Package sold by weight, not volume. Your mileage may vary. Known as Hellman's east of the Rockies. Beware of greeks bearing gifts. Beware of gifts bearing greeks. This side up. Don't take any wooden nickels. Don't take candy from strangers. Void where prohibited. Caveat Emptor (Buyer beware) Caveat Vendor (Beware of street people). Donde esta el bano. Beware of DOS. Look both ways before crossing the street. All your base are belong to us. Always wear safety belt. Always wear deodorant. Don't forget to breathe. If you park, don't drink...accidents cause people. This supersedes all previous notices.

This modified disclaimer may not be copied without the expressed written consent of whoever I stole it from.

DISCLAIMER

DISCLAIMER: All clauses of this disclaimer apply to the disclaimer itself, except for this first sentence. All other disclaimers that may be found on this site, or sites linked to herein, are obviously subsets of this disclaimer and/or invalid, illegal, or fattening. This disclaimer is provided for informational, misinformational and metainformational purposes only and should not be construed as a solicitation or offer for anything whatsoever. All metainformation, HTML tags, photographs, artwork, text, opinions, ideas, facts or factoids contained in this site are either my own, and therefore are Copyright ©1997-2002 by Rainer Brockerhoff, or duly licensed from and/or attributed to the writers, owners or copyright holders, or in good faith presumed to be in the public domain; however, you're free to copy, reproduce, expand, excerpt or adapt this disclaimer to your own purposes, at your own risk, as long as you assume all responsibility for doing so. All comments published in public forums are under the exclusive responsibility of the respective posters and may be subject to separate copyright provisions and disclaimers; however, I reserve the right to edit, delete, curtate or eliminate all comments on personal whim. This shall be subject to no criteria of reasonableness. All posters to such forums must implicitly accept the full provisions of this disclaimer. All products, brands and company names mentioned will probably be trademarks or trade names of the respective companies and you should mentally insert the appropriate ™, ©, ® or whatever wherever appropriate. Any links to external sites and any comments about the contents thereof should not be construed as endorsement, tolerance, approval or disapproval of such contents, even if such comments overtly purport to do so. E-mail me (rainer AT brockerhoff.net) if you have detected a demonstrable copyright violation. 90% of all cited statistics may have been made up on the spot. Before entering this site be sure to make at least two back-up copies of your mind and other important data on other media to protect against data loss. Brains sold separately. Sense of humor must be provided by third parties. Caveat Browsor. Use, duplication, disclosure or ritual exorcism of this information by the Government (any Government) is subject to the restrictions of physical laws. There is no conscious attempt made nor desire extant to libel or otherwise cause malicious damage, loss, public contempt, defamation, slander, blasphemy, treason, sedition, or ridicule to persons of any gender or even none, cabals, corporations, governments, institutions, corporations, or assemblies of inanimate objects, alien lifeforms, microorganisms, clergy, vegetables, animals, or any collections thereof. No representation whatsoever is made as to the accuracy, political correctness, spelling, syntax, semantics, content or meaning of the graphics, text or downloadable files on this site, or of suitability for use or quoting elsewhere or for any other particular porpoise. As far as I'm concerned all information herein consists solely of sequences of zeroes and ones, being presented as either a satire or a parody of other sequences of zeroes and ones (or even of the ones and zeroes themselves) and neither I nor my service provider can be held responsible for any further interpretation, guesstimate, translation, transliteration, compression, decompression, exegesis, deconstruction, memetic emission or absorption, catalysis, curtation, transmogrification, alteration or forgery of such sequences made by either your hardware, software or wetware, or by any intervening data communications channel, even if previously advised of such a possibility. Any actions you take based on whatever you saw, or think you saw, on this site are entirely your own responsibility, so there! This site is directed at reasonably mature people of any age and if you're not among them, life will be tough. Since all of the Internet's web pages are interlinked you will sooner than later come to what you may consider an ugly, silly, stupid, obscene or otherwise offensive site. Don't say I didn't warn you! No electrons, protons, neutrons, quarks or other sub-atomic particles, or agglomerations thereof, have been knowingly harmed in preparing this site. All quantum fields and/or state vectors related to this site may spontaneously collapse, decohere, and/or go all higgledy-piggledy as soon as you look at them, and I can't do anything about it. You may have some rights not detailed in this disclaimer but don't bet on it. Apply only to affected area. Do not use while sleeping, unconscious, or insufficiently caffeinated. For indoor or outdoor use only. Not suitable as a personal flotation device. An optional Internet connection is required. All models are over 18 years of age or the local equivalent. Avoid contact with mucous membranes. Do not insert body parts into moving components. Keep out of children. Contents may settle during shipment or downloading. This disclaimer does not cover hurricane, lightning, tornado, tsunami, volcanic eruption, earthquake, flood, and other Acts of God, Gods and/or Godesses, misuse, neglect, leaking batteries, unauthorized repair, damage from improper installation, broken antenna or marred cabinet, incorrect line voltage, missing or altered serial numbers, sonic boom vibrations, electromagnetic radiation from nuclear blasts, customer adjustment, genetic drift, random neuronal firing, and incidents owing to airplane crash, ship sinking, motor vehicle accidents, leaky roof, broken glass, falling rocks, mud slides, forest fire, flying projectiles, or dropping the item. Many browsers look alike. Others don't. Use only in a well-ventilated area. Do not bend, fold, spindle, mutilate, clone, inflate, deflate, imbibe, or chew. Do not use while operating a motor vehicle, heavy equipment, airplane, hang glider, cellphone, or any powered device inserted into bodily orifices. If a rash, redness, irritation, or swelling develops, discontinue use. If condition persists, consult your physician. No user-serviceable parts inside. Objects in browser may be closer than they appear. One size fits all. Quantities are limited while supplies last. Not intended for highway use. Not responsible for advice not taken. Disclaimer subject to change without notice. Your mileage may vary. All your disclaimer are belong to us. This supersedes all previous disclaimers. Reading a disclaimer like this all the way to the end may have caused irreversible but not necessarily malign changes to your neural whatchamacallits. Fnord. To have the secret second part of this disclaimer transmitted to you over a telepathic tight-beam channel (at 300 bauds nominal, odd parity), bury a signed non-disclosure agreement and exact $1000 in consecutively numbered three-dollar bills in your backyard and stand by for further instructions.